When you want to have a baby, you want it to happen as soon as possible. For some, the journey to parenthood comes much easier and goes much more smoothly than others. One way to bring a child into the world is by using a sperm donor. After consulting with a fertility specialist to decide if this method of conception is going to be right for you, it is common to have some apprehensions. Read on to learn about some of the concerns that potential parents have about donor insemination—you’re not alone!
1. The baby will be less healthy
A baby conceived through artificial insemination will be no less healthy than a baby that is conceived naturally. As with any pregnancy and delivery, there are risks. Things can happen along the way, but there is no evidence that suggests any kind of health problem will occur because you used donor sperm, or underwent fertility treatment.
2. People will judge you
Sure, using a sperm donor is not the “norm” for many people. That is why some choose to keep their choice to themselves, or only notify close family members and friends about their decision. It can also be a delicate situation when a woman who is married or in a relationship needs to utilize sperm from another man. The important thing that occurs from this experience is that a baby forms and brings joy into your life. If it doesn’t matter to you how you build your family, it certainly shouldn’t matter to others.
3. You don’t know the donor’s full background
Quite the contrary. In order to become a donor, you have to complete a detailed report that includes the family history health of the donor. They are screened for diseases and even genetic disorders.
4. It won’t work
One of the biggest letdowns hopeful parents can have is the failure of a fertility treatment. While it is upsetting, it also may take a few tries to be successful. So, if your specialist has confirmed that you are a good candidate for donor insemination, it’s important to be realistic about your outcomes, yet positive if you were given the green light to try it.
5. You’ll have birth complications
Again, there is no data that supports that babies via donor sperm are at a higher risk of having birth complications. You have the equal chance of a successful birth as many who conceive naturally.
6. The baby will not share your family’s characteristics
Expectant parents considering a sperm donor may be concerned the baby will not look similar to their family and may even have some aptitude difficulties later in life. When searching for a donor, you are able to read a thorough description of what the donor looks like and can learn a lot about them through their writing. You can select a donor that has similar traits to get a close match if that is desired. Many facilities ask their donors to go into detail about themselves, their life, their interests, and their abilities as well, so you should have a pretty clear picture about the finer details of your candidates.
7. Your partner will be uncomfortable raising a child with no genetic connection
This is a big concern that needs to be addressed before you even begin to think about donor insemination. If you and your partner are not on the same page, issues and difficulties can arise down the road. Many partners may feel this way at first, but most accept the fact that they would rather have a child in their life, than none at all.
8. You don’t know how you’ll explain to your child how they were conceived
This is a personal choice for many parents. Some opt to not tell their child at all. Others wait until their child is older and can understand the conception process. Others will tell their child immediately and explain it in terms they can understand and reinforce the topic as they grow. It’s normal to feel worried because your main concern is your child’s feelings. It may not matter to your child where they came from. However, some children do seek out their biological father as they come of age, so it is important to be realistic and understand that this is something they may want to pursue. When considering using a sperm donor, you have to be honest with yourself and decide if this is something that you would support and can handle before undergoing any kind of treatment.
While there is no right way to bring a child into the world, it is common to have mixed emotions about it. You’re not alone. It is normal to have concerns and questions about undergoing fertility treatment by using a sperm donor. Whatever you decide to do, feel confident in the fact that you are doing what is right for you and your family.